It’s easy to feel down in the dumps about life, in fact I’ve fallen into this trap a few times – when job opportunities didn’t work out, when relationships ended, or when my life looked different to my friend’s Instagram posts. But when I sat back and looked at each of these moments, I noticed I was feeling down because I was directing all my attention towards what was missing in my life, or not quite right about the situation.
I noticed that focusing on what wasn’t wasted precious time, mental capacity, and energy that could’ve been harnessed and directed towards making things better for myself.
And this is extremely common for all of us. When life isn’t quite panning out exactly as you thought it would, you immediately jump to focusing on the negative elements. You fixate on the qualities you don’t have rather than the ones you do, the doors that are closed to you rather than the ones that are open and waiting, or on what someone lacks in your relationship rather than what they give.
So, what do you do about it?
Life’s always going to chuck in a few plot twists, and you often can’t choose the circumstance you’re in, but what you can choose is your attitude and how you respond to things in life. Simply put, if you want good focus on what’s already good!
Our brains are wired this way, it’s like an obedient dog following a command, always searching and finding answers associated to what you’re focusing on, this in turn starts to determine the interactions and activities you engage in, the relationships you have, and the opportunities that are presented to you.
Therefore, if you’re someone who finds yourself falling down in the dumps and life’s getting increasingly more difficult for you, I encourage you to reflect on the following –
- Where in your life are you spending too much time and energy on what isn’t working or what you don’t have?
- Go back and ask yourself what it is you actually want here?
- Where can you shift your focus towards what’s good and what you do have in your life, and how can you use these to move you one step closer to what you want?